RUSH: Adam in Idaho Falls, Idaho. Nice to have you on the EIB Network. Hello.
CALLER: Hi, Rush. How are you?
RUSH: Very well, sir. Thank you.
CALLER: I am a first-time caller and a lifetime listener.
RUSH: Thank you.
CALLER: I’ve listened to you since I was four or five years old.
RUSH: Whoa! How old are you now?
CALLER: I’m 18.
RUSH: Oh. You’re a genuine, true Rush Baby here.
CALLER: Yep. I just voted for the first time last week. Very exciting.
RUSH: I don’t even need to ask you how you voted, either.
CALLER: Nope. No, you don’t. (chuckles) I just wanted to call you to reassure you about that young man that called you yesterday and told you how he thought about your comments about the British students.
RUSH: Oh, yeah, the New Castrati guy from San Antonio.
CALLER: Yeah. I just wanted to let you know that he doesn’t represent the young Americans in this country. He obviously was ‘with Mary Jane,’ if you know what I’m saying.
RUSH: Oh, yeah, he was out there with a doobie.
CALLER: Yep. (chuckles) To say the least.
RUSH: That’s what upset him! I’m calling these British people ‘longhaired, dope-smoking, maggot-infested FM types.’ I’m sure he’s one of those three things.
CALLER: Probably all three, more likely.
RUSH: (laughing)
CALLER: But I gotta tell you I would do just about anything to pay what those students are paying for tuition in the UK. I mean, what was it, like five grand a year that they’re paying?
RUSH: They’re paying close to that, yeah, and it’s gonna go up to nine.
CALLER: Yeah.
RUSH: They’re raising it nine to 14,000 pounds, 9,000 or something like that, yeah.
CALLER: And it cost, what, 20 grand for college these days for a semester?
RUSH: Well, yeah, depending it could be even more here, 25. So the increase I think is $3,000 equivalent is what the increase is.
CALLER: Yeah, and that’s if you go to a state college. That’s not if you want to go to another college. But I just wanted to let you know that he does not represent the young Americans in this country.
RUSH: Well, I know that, I know. His call served a fun purpose. In fact, Mike, you ought to get that call and we ought to have it standing by. (interruption) You have it? We don’t have time to play this. People thought that this was a parody call because this guy sounds exactly like when I speak of the New Castrati and make fun of ’em. I had people think this was a whole setup, a brilliant setup that I had put on people, and it wasn’t. This guy’s a genuine caller. Here. Here’s part of it.
BEGIN NEW CASTRATI CALLER CLIP
RUSH: Bobby, San Antonio, Texas. Welcome to the EIB Network, sir.
CALLER: (angry) You know, as I sit here and I listen to you pass judgment onto others for the way they look or substance abuse. I think to myself, ‘That’s really funny.’ You know, talk about hypocrisy. Come on, coming from an addict like yourself. You say you love the country so much —
RUSH: What do you mean, talking about the way they look?
CALLER: Yes. You do it all the time. I sit here and I listen to these really bad parodies that you guys play while people are on hold.
RUSH: (sigh)
CALLER: They’re really mean and nasty, and they’re personal, and they’re wrong. You pick on Jesse Jackson. That’s a man who stood with Martin Luther King. He’s practically a prophet, and I’m sure if Martin were alive today, you would have parodies of him, too, because we know exactly what you’re about, Mr. Limbaugh!
RUSH: (New Castrati impression) What am I ‘about,’ sir? What am I about? Tell me, Mr. New Castrati, just exactly what am I ‘about,’ sir?
CALLER: Well, you talked about giving tax breaks, more tax breaks to the richest of the rich. If this country needs you… For a person like yourself who’s taken so much while taking nothing back — while giving nothing back — when is it your turn to give something back this country that you claim to love so, SIR? When will it be time for you to care about someone else other than your own…?
RUSH: Let me tell you something.
CALLER: All you care about is profit!
RUSH: I have given back —
CALLER: All you care about is lies!
RUSH: I have given back —
CALLER: (shouting)
RUSH: Take this lamebrain off the air. I have given back to my country and to my fellow citizens more in one year than you are gonna earn in your worthless life, Mr. New Castrati — and if you ever get famous, we’ll do a parody on you, too, because it would bring big-time yuks.
END NEW CASTRATI CALLER CLIP
RUSH: So that’s it. (laughing) That was Mr. New Castrati yesterday. It was from San Antonio, and he was legit. I got two kinds a e-mail response. One line of response was just livid at you, Snerdley, for even putting the guy on the air, and the other line of response was, ‘Come on, Rush, you made all that up. Nobody really talks or sounds that way,’ and it was legit. You heard it, Mr. New Castrati. It was typical, the greatest example of it we coulda found.