RUSH: We have with us a young man named Corbin. He’s from Sweeny, Texas. He’s 14 years old. Corbin, I’m so glad that you called and that you got through. How are you doing today, sir?
CALLER: I’m doing very good. Thank you for taking my call.
RUSH: Yes, sir. You’re welcome.
CALLER: I was calling in to thank you for three great things you’ve done in my life. First, and the best one is that one of my mom’s conditions for dating my dad was that he had to start listening to the Rush Limbaugh program, to your show, and if my dad wouldn’t have started listening to your show and enjoyed it and became who he is now, I wouldn’t be alive.
RUSH: That’s very perceptive. (laughing) You wouldn’t be here, Corbin, if your dad hadn’t done what your mom wanted him to do and ended up liking the program. I can see why you’re thrilled about that. You’d much rather be here than not, especially now, right?
CALLER: Yes, sir.
RUSH: What’s the second reason?
CALLER: The second reason is I absolutely love your Rush Revere books. Liberty is hilarious.
RUSH: Thank you. Thank you so much. You’re making my day here, Corbin. You really are. What is the third reason?
CALLER: The third reason is because I’m homeschooled, so I’ll go to work and help my dad at his job site, and we’ll listen to your show and I really enjoy that. It makes my time that I spend with my dad a lot more enjoyable.
RUSH: Wow. This is wonderful. Corbin, I don’t know how to thank you. Corbin, would your parents mind if I sent you an iPad? Do you have an iPad?
CALLER: No, I do not.
RUSH: Do you think your parents would mind if I sent you one?
CALLER: No, I don’t think they would.
RUSH: Okay, cool. Well, we will. I’m gonna send you one out, so I want you to hold on here ’cause we’re about out of time but —
RUSH: — I can’t thank you enough. Corbin, you’re ranking up there, you’re one of the all-time, top 10 best calls we’ve had on this program.
CALLER: Thank you.
RUSH: You have knocked it out of the park, young man. So you hang on, we’ll get your address. I’m gonna send you some stuff from Liberty, too, from the —
RUSH: — Rush Revere gang. So, yeah, yeah, yeah, you deserve that and more, and your parents, too. So thank you again. I’m glad you got through. Don’t hang up the phone, Mr. Snerdley will be right back with you.
RUSH: That’s the best dating demand I’ve ever heard. She says to him, “You have got to listen to Rush Limbaugh, and you’d better like it, or we’re not going anywhere.” Young Corbin. You know what? He’d make a good member of Trump’s cabinet. Assistant secretary of education for youth outreach or some such thing.