RUSH: You know, I love to see this. New York City, I think, is back. If we’re looking for signs — and we all are — that we’re returning to normal, they’re there. A lot of us are desperately reaching for normal. We want normalcy to return. The news out of New York may give us some hint that things are at least returning to normal there. For example…
“A street performer dressed as Spider-Man was arrested after punching a policeman who told him he could not demand money from tourists.” It happened Saturday afternoon. “Junior Bishop, 25, dressed up at Spider-Man, was overheard by a cop refusing a $1 bill from a woman, a tourist, with whom he’d taken a picture.” You’ve got tourists in there and they think it’s really Spider-Man.
Junior Bishop was posing, the woman offered him a buck, and instead he demanded more money. A cop overheard this. The police officer told Spider-Man, “You can only accept tips out here, but you cannot demand money.” Well, Spider-Man punched the cop in the face. So then the cop told Spider-Man he was under arrest, and he punched him again. New York is back!
“This is not the first incident of ‘Street Performer’ violence. Last month, another Spider-Man was fined $370 for punching a tourist who threw a snowball at him.” Spider-Man couldn’t get out of the way of the snowball, got embarrassed, and beat up the tourist. “Cookie Monster was arrested in 2013, under suspicion of pushing a 2-year -old” child! New York is back, folks!
The Cookie Monster shoved a 2-year-old child when his mother refused to tip him. “In 2012, a man dressed as Elmo was arrested after going on an anti-Semitic tirade.” It’s so great to see this stuff starting to happen again. I mean, this lets you know… Am I not right? This means that New York is back! I mean, the only thing they need to do now is reopen Studio 54. Bring it back and make sure Johnny Manziel’s there every night.
Well, Halston can’t go ’cause he’s passed away, and Warhol can’t go ’cause he’s passed away. So we need to restock Studio. Elaine can’t go because she passed away. (interruption) Cher can go, and she… (interruption) That’s right, she can bring her walker. Do you mean the actual walker or an escort? (interruption) You mean the actual walker. Well, you know, ’cause down here “walkers” are escorts for the octogenarian crowd.
The old ladies that are invited to charity balls, 25-year-old young men escort them and they’re called “walkers.” So when you said, “Cher could show up with a walker,” I didn’t know which you’re talking about. Down here in Palm Beach that could be with a young guy, virile young guy, by the way. (interruption) You didn’t know that? (interruption) Oh, yeah, there’s a convention for the walkers every year.
I’m not gonna tell you what it is. They don’t call themselves that. There’s another name for ’em every New Year’s Eve. Oh, yeah! (interruption) No, Snerdley would not be a great walker. Snerdley’s too old. Snerdley… (interruption) Well, some walkers get a guest bedroom for the season if they’re used every day. Some walkers are given, you know, free access to whatever is at the party that night.
Walkers are always given clothes, money to buy a tuxedo or whatever the dress code requires. Sometimes walkers are given money to rent a limo if the old lady in question doesn’t have one, or if the one she has is a 1947 Rolls that’s broken down. (interruption) Oh, yeah, it’s a whole subculture here. (interruption) You didn’t know that? You…? (interruption) Oh-ho-ho, yeah. It’s big. It’s big. It’s never talked about.
I’m probably blowing it big time here. (interruption) Dawn knows what I’m talking about. She’s nodding her head in there. Now, in the Saturday incident, when Spider-Man beat up the cop — his name again was Junior Bishop, 25. “He was charged with assaulting an officer, resisting arrest, criminal mischief and disorderly conduct. The officer was treated for his injuries at a nearby hospital and released.”
New York is back!