Rush Limbaugh

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RUSH: Folks, look, in the midst of all this political tension, it’s time for a little break. We need to take a break, just for a moment here. You remember back (it wasn’t that long ago) when we at Two If By Tea…? It remains the absolute best-tasting iced tea in this country. We had people make their own Two If By Tea commercials, YouTube-type videos, that were put together by you in the audience. We did this last year.

There were people in New Hampshire that dressed up in colonial gear and did a Two If By Tea rap. Some of the videos that we got, we were jazzed by them. The creativity and the passion and the ambition that was in these videos was a clear indication of just who the people in this country really still are. There are a bunch of people with creativity and ambition just waiting to be turned loose and unleashed, and it was really fun.

We did it just to see what we would get.

I mean, it’s a startup. We’re looking for people to do commercials for us for free. I was walking around asking people, “Do you believe in free speech?” “Oh, yeah!” “Well, fine. I have a commercial for my tea company I’d like you to do at no charge.” “What are you talking about?” “Well, you said you believe in free speech.” No, I’m just having fun. We really just wanted to see what we would get, and we were bowled over with the amount of effort that people put into — and the creativity, and the production values that people put into — creating these videos.

So what we’ve done is we’ve decided to combine that creativity with another phenomena that happens with Two If By Tea. Have you ever covered the label of bottle? You’ve been with some liberals, and they’re ripping me or they don’t like me, and you know it. Maybe my name has come up and you just know they don’t like me. You’ve got the tea and you somehow want them to taste it ’cause it’s the best tea around. You want to hear them say that they love the tea and you can’t wait to show ’em the label.

You can’t wait to show them whose tea it is: El Rushbo’s.

Well, you do that. We got notes from people all the time that this happens. We get e-mails. People go to the Two If By Tea website and tell us these stories. So what we’re gonna do is combine that now into a YouTube contest for Two If By Tea. You can check it all out at the website. It’s on the home page at TwoIfByTea.com. The YouTube contest is called “You’ve Been Limbaugh’d.” We actually created a name for this.

It’s a takeoff on, “You’ve been punk’d,” and all the details are there. All the requirements that you have to have to be eligible for one of your commercials to be judged in the final cut-down as to which ones have a chance at winning. We’re looking for humor. If you want to do something serious, stately, patriotic, historical, you can, but there are requirements.

You’ll see how many times you’ve gotta say Two If By Tea, Limbaugh’d, all that kind of thing. There are requirements that you have to meet. I think we’re doing a 60-second time limit on these things. Folks, it might seem tough to say all you want to say in 60 seconds, but don’t forget Shakespeare: “Brevity is the soul of wit.” Any artist will tell you that what makes his work great is what you take out of it when you think there’s no more you can take out of it. It’s the continued editing.

Don’t be daunted by the 60-seconds. Sixty seconds is plenty of time. In fact, the more you say and the more punch you put in it, the more punch it’ll have in 60 seconds. All the details, all of the rules, are explained right there on the home page at TwoIfByTea.com. We can’t guarantee that you won’t be arrested by the government for what you produce, though. We would like to be able to guarantee that you won’t be arrested.

But given what happened to the video guy out in California, I can’t guarantee it. (laughing) So remember: You’re producing your own video here at your own risk. (laughing) Can you just see it: A Two If By Tea, You’ve Been Limbaugh’d video being blamed for something by Obama? We’re not gonna be responsible for any violence that your video causes. We’re not gonna apologize, either. If your video that you’ve produced for You’ve Been Limbaugh’d for Two If By Tea causes violence, you are swimming alone!

You are on your own.

We’re not apologizing for you to anybody anywhere.

So just go to the Two If By Tea website. It’s all there, and all the rules are explained, and the prizes and so forth. We’re still working on that, but we’re close.

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