Rush Limbaugh

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RUSH: Hey, folks, you don’t know this because this is radio. You’re gonna have to trust me, but we’ve got something that never happens here going on here today. Well, not “never” but it’s never happened to this degree. A long time ago, last year, we had a giant promotion for Two If By Tea (psst! dot-com). As a grand prize the opportunity to come visit the EIB Network for a day and a half and to watch the program take place, stay in a wonderful hotel, have dinner and so forth, have lunch here at the studio, meet the staff, be entertained by anybody, and they are here. And today is the day they are here, and you ought to see them. They are standing back there in rapt attention.

They look like the Stepford wives. Their mouths have been opened for three hours. They can’t believe where they are, they can’t believe how much phony fun they’re having, they can’t believe how awesome it all is. Actually the truth is that I met them all right before the show. About ten ’til noon before the program started. They got in here this morning around what time? What time did you the guy get in here? Was it 10:30, or 11 o’clock, somewhere around there? For the tour and number of other things and I ran into ’em right before they were scheduled to eat lunch, and you know what they want to talk about? They wanted to talk about the Golf Channel. They wanted to talk about Hank Haney and whether or not I retained anything. Here they had one chance to ask any political question whatsoever and I got peppered with questions about Hank Haney. Which is fine.

Anyway, it’s great to have you all here. These are the people that make the country work. That is what’s so heartwarming. It always has been for me, about the audience, all of you who listen to this program, backbone of the country, the people who literally make it work. Without all of you this program wouldn’t exist, and it wouldn’t survive, and I don’t know how to thank you all, ever. It’s not possible to express the level of gratitude that I have.

So we’ve got further giant, big Two If By Tea promotions coming up, other sweepstakes opportunities. Some winners went to Hawaii. These eight people are here watching the program, and they all have their own director’s chairs, and they’re listening to Snerdley screen calls and argue with callers. Is he being nice? Just nod your head. Oh, no. You haven’t seen the real Snerdley. He’s being nice to callers today? Oh. For the last half hour you gotta be who you really are on the phones, Bo. You can’t just sit there and — (interruption) That’s not the point. We don’t fake it and be nice here when we’re not. Take the gloves off, tell these callers what you really think of ’em when you — he-he-he-he-he-he-he.

Anyway, they’re all here, and we’re taking them to dinner tonight, and then we’ll be very sad when tomorrow comes and they have to depart for home. But it is great to have you all here. And it’s different having a live audience here watching all this. They can hear everything that goes on, and they get to see — I’ve always said that radio is radio for a reason. It’s not to be seen. It’s to be heard, to fully appreciate it. But this one is different. This show, the interaction that takes place, and all that happens watching it is a big bonus. But we’re ecstatic to have you all here. We thank you for entering the big sweepstakes, congratulate you for winning, and, who knows, you may end up coming back someday.

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