“The Saudis have arrested over 170 suspected terrorists who had a plot against their oil fields. Well, how did they get to these guys? Did they violate the Fourth Amendment? The UN charter? The Geneva Conventions? And, of course, if they used torture on them, we may have to let these people go.”
“The people who write immediate history are people who hate Bush. But when we’re all gone, the history of what has been attempted here in Iraq will be written and Bush is going to be credited with sticking to it with a great vision.”
“In Philadelphia, they’ve shut down psychics and fortunetellers. I guess the psychics didn’t see it coming. Ha, ha! Sorry, that might be racist in some way; I don’t know. If it is, I apologize.”
“Snerdley, you are pathetic! ‘I can see your beauty through the phone.’ You are pathetic in there!”
“Why did John Edwards stumble and take 12 seconds to answer the question?And then he said, ‘I don’t think I can identify one person as my moral leader’? He was probably saying to himself, ‘What the hell is this question? We’re a bunch of liberals here and he’s asking us about morality?'”
“This country is so affluent and there’s so much economic opportunity here that it’s breath-taking — especially when you travel the world and see what genuine poverty and genuine economic depression is. This country is the Garden of Eden.”
“You might say that Mrs. Bill Clinton is the ‘Magic Caucasian.’ She just is! The views expressed by the host on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, or sponsors of this station.”
“The Democrats kept talking about how ‘the American people spoke in 2006.’ But what did they speak about? Let’s be honest. The Democrats won the Senate with one word: ‘Macaca.’ And they won the House with one dirty trick: the Foley scandal.”
“Of course Hillary will be the first multilingual president! Her husband was the first cunnilingual president — he was a very cunning guy.”