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“It’s too soon, ladies and gentlemen, because until we see those legs protruding from underneath the house, you can’t say that Hillary is dead.”
“A friend of mine just sent me a copy of a Boston Globe story from the 20th of December. It’s an interview with Barack Obama on foreign policy. You know, folks, you read this, and you just go: ‘Oh, God, we are in trouble.'”
“What in the world could somebody like Hillary do to assure us there will be no more Bill scandals, especially considering Bill’s whole life is a scandal? I’d be appreciative if any of you other babes want to take a stab at this when we get back tomorrow.”
“Mr. Jobs, please help me. I know we don’t agree onpolitics — you love Algore (by the way, I have no problem with him now) — but can you put me through to somebody that can get my Mac working? Because I know it has to work for most people.”
“A bunch of e-mails during the break: ‘Rush, if you’re buying all these new Mac Pros to replace your existing Macs, what do you do with the old Macs?’ We give them to the homeless, folks. We find bridges that have Wi-Fi and we drop them off.”
“Very few things in life I hate, but going clothes shoppingI despise. I don’t care if the tailor comes to the house, I hate it. I hate trying stuff on, I hate picking stuff out. Sorry to share that with you, folks. I know it pales in comparison to problems you’re having in the subprime crisis.”
“The liberals have succeeded in 50 years in placing more and more people on the rolls of dependency. This is why conservative leadership is sorely needed: to be able to explain to people that their future is being robbed.”
“Our freedom, as documented in our founding documents and acknowledged as having come from God, is the reason this country — in less than 300 years — rules the world like no other group of human beings ever has.”
“Mayor Bloomberg yesterday compared the scourge of global warming to the threat of terrorism and the proliferation of weapons of mass destruction. Ron Paul wouldn’t even say this. L. Ron Hubbard wouldn’t even say this.”
“The real reason we have all these three-day weekends in the early part of the year is because of the ski industry. Hell, yes! Big Ski lobbied successfully for a lot of Monday holidays.”