{"id":33608,"date":"2009-10-02T01:01:01","date_gmt":"2011-05-19T01:50:31","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2011-05-19T01:50:31","modified_gmt":"2011-05-19T01:50:31","slug":"how_letterman_gets_laughs","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/admin.rushlimbaugh.com\/daily\/2009\/10\/02\/how_letterman_gets_laughs\/","title":{"rendered":"How Letterman Gets Laughs"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n

RUSH: Let\u2019s go to David Letterman. Oh! Where is that story? You know, folks, this is a day where — as I have said — the fraud and corruption that is the US media is on display real time. It is visible, viewable, detectable real time. Now, we all know what happened last night on Letterman. AP… AP has a television writer named Lynn Elber, headline: ‘Letterman Creates Brilliant Hour of TV From Woes — It was business as usual for David Letterman and CBS\u2019 ‘Late Show.\u2019 The band played. The host, dapper as always in a well-tailored suit, recited his monologue; some jokes hit, some missed. Then Letterman proceeded to take viewers, and television, on an extraordinary journey that was part confessional, part entertainment and wholly, if jarringly, hypnotic. The medium has come close to moments like this before — Hugh Grant\u2019s prostitute mea culpa on ‘Tonight\u2019 is the familiar example of recent years — but never achieved the merger of farce and drama that Letterman finessed.\u2019 So here is AP illustrating the entire corruption — the social, moral corruption — that is the US media, saying that last night\u2019s Letterman show is only paralleled in its greatness when Hugh Grant went on The Tonight Show and admitted that he had paid and bought a prostitute and put her in his car in Hollywood. Great television! So we\u2019ve done something. Here\u2019s Letterman admitting the affair, and the audience laughing.<\/p>\n

LETTERMAN: The creepy stuff was that I have, uh, had sex with women who work for me on this show. Now, my response to that is, ‘Yes, I have.\u2019 (applause) I have had sex with women who worked on the show. And — and would it be em-embarrassing if it were made public? Perhaps it would. Perhaps it would. (laughter) Es-especially for the women. (laughter) But that\u2019s a decision for them to make, if they want to come public and talk about the relationships, if I want to go public and talk about the relationships. But what you don\u2019t want is a guy saying, ‘Oh, I — I know he had sex with women so I — I — I would like $2 million or I\u2019m going to make trouble for you.\u2019 So that\u2019s where we stand right now.<\/p>\n

RUSH: So he was being extorted so he went out there and told the story and the audience laughed about it. I, ladies and gentlemen, want to take this occasion to tell you that I have never had sex with anyone on my staff. I admit… (interruption) Because…? No, not because you\u2019re all ugly! It\u2019s because I have standards of decency. I have never had sex with anyone on the staff. Never, ever have I had sex with anyone on the staff. (interruption) What\u2019s indecent about having relations with a member of the staff? It\u2019s a power thing, Snerdley. You don\u2019t do it. You just don\u2019t do it. You know, you don\u2019t. I got all kinds of phrases I could use to explain it. ‘You don\u2019t eat where you go to the bathroom.\u2019 All right, you just… Everybody knows it\u2019s common decency in business anywhere, and here\u2019s Letterman being laughed and applauded for it. So what we have done is, we have taken Letterman\u2019s statement and we have gotten some comments from previous statements by others: Sarah Palin and Barack Obama. Letterman has spoken to Obama and about Palin, and here is how that goes.<\/p>\n

LETTERMAN: The creepy stuff was that I have, uh, had sex with women who work for me on this show. Now, my response to that is, ‘Yes, I have.\u2019<\/p>\n

PALIN: Pretty pathetic, good old David Letterman.<\/p>\n

LETTERMAN: (laughter and applause) I have had sex with women who worked on the show.<\/p>\n

PALIN: What a commentary there.<\/p>\n

LETTERMAN: And would it be em-embarrassing if it were made public? Perhaps it would.<\/p>\n

OBAMA: He\u2019s a jackass.<\/p>\n

RUSH: And we\u2019ll be back right after this.<\/p>\n

BREAK TRANSCRIPT<\/p>\n

RUSH: Here is Daniel in Greencastle, Indiana, nice to have you on the EIB Network. Hello.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Hello, sir. How you doing today?<\/p>\n

RUSH: Very well. Thank you very much.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Well, first of all I\u2019d like to say I\u2019ve been a listener of yours for many years and I want salute you, sir, for standing up and making a stand and telling the truth, in spite of the media that\u2019s controlled by the state and its propaganda.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Thank you very much, sir. I appreciate that. I really do.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Well, I appreciate you, sir. I am a 20-year retired Navy veteran, and I am proud to be an American. I have two young boys and I teach them to be proud Americans. Despite what they hear in the media and despite what Obama is going around and telling the world.<\/p>\n

RUSH: God bless you, sir. It\u2019s a risk.<\/p>\n

CALLER: I believe in the American people and our republic, and the morals and values and ethics on which that was built. And I believe that the American people, we will survive this administration. I\u2019m just wondering how much damage that it\u2019s going to do in the meantime.<\/p>\n

RUSH: We\u2019re all wondering about that, but imagine! Look at what you just said. ‘The American people will survive this administration.\u2019 Normally it\u2019s said about, ‘We\u2019ll survive during this conflict. We\u2019ll survive despite Hurricane Katrina. We\u2019ll survive despite the 9\/11 attacks.\u2019 Now we\u2019re out there saying we\u2019ll survive Barack Obama.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Well, sir, I took a pledge to make a stand against any enemies foreign and domestic. Right now I believe we have enemies that are domestic. The first thing that I\u2019d like to talk about is this Letterman affair. <\/p>\n

RUSH: Which one? <\/p>\n

CALLER: (chuckling)<\/p>\n

RUSH: Apparently there were many staffers with whom he did the down low and the nasty.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Well, you know, I\u2019d like to comment on his rebuttal, him admitting that he did it. First of all he is not remorseful and it\u2019s obvious that he will continue to do it, and it\u2019s also obvious that he is a tyrant among his staff. Now, in any big corporation and the military, we have a word for this. It\u2019s called ‘fraternization,\u2019 and sex with subordinates definitely falls under that. In fact, that\u2019s the word.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Yeah, we heard about the Tailhook stuff.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Yeah, Tailhook. You know, that\u2019s when it all started. That\u2019s when the military really got on board and started cracking down and training us that this will not be tolerated. It means contempt, distrust, jealousy, and undermines the overall productivity of his whole staff.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Right. And it leads to extortion attempts.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Exactly. And in the military, especially if it was an officer or any supervisor — and also in any big corporation today — they teach this. That person, if they were found to have done this, would be forced to resign.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Uh, ah, ah, ah, ah! No. It used to be, maybe, but not in the White House.<\/p>\n

CALLER: No, sir. Not in the White House.<\/p>\n

RUSH: This has happened in the White House as well. If it weren\u2019t for the success of me and my buddies in the vast right-wing conspiracy successfully getting hold of some of Clinton\u2019s semen and then getting hold of Monica Lewinsky\u2019s blue dress and then putting that semen on the blue dress waiting for it to be discovered, do you realize where we\u2019d be today if I hadn\u2019t pulled that off?<\/p>\n

CALLER: Well, sir, you exposed that, and I take my hat off to you.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Thank you very much.<\/p>\n

CALLER: That was an excellent job. And I was listening to you way before that happened. Well, anyway, what I was saying was: An officer that is found guilty of that or any big supervisor on CEO would — first of all, he\u2019d never make another promotion, and he would be forced to resign because he would never make another promotion.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Well, you know, that\u2019s one of the great things about the military. It\u2019s one institution that has not been corrupted by the collapse in societal mores. As I mentioned earlier today, the AP has a review. This is Letterman\u2019s greatest show ever! It\u2019s only rivaled in greatness by the Tonight Show episode where Hugh Grant came on and admitted and explained why he had picked up a slut and a prostitute in some back alley neighborhood in Los Angeles. Great television! The corruption and fraud of the United States media is breathtaking, and it\u2019s happening now in real time. Daniel, thanks much. It\u2019s an honor to have you in the audience, sir. I\u2019m glad you called. <\/p>\n

BREAK TRANSCRIPT<\/p>\n

RUSH: Folks, I\u2019m sitting here and I just had a sudden thought. My mind\u2019s exploding today. The neurons are firing at a record rate today. With Roman Polanski out there being defended for ‘not rape-rape\u2019 with a 13-year-old girl and with Letterman being applauded and getting laughter admitting affairs with members of his staff, could there be a better time for all Republicans to come out at every affair they\u2019ve ever had or every date rape that they have ever engaged in? If they\u2019ve got that skeleton in the closet, this would be a great time. They might get a hero\u2019s welcome from everybody for doing it here today. I mean, if the Republicans are worried about… Imagine! Mark Foley could have just waited \u2019til now for this to come out. I mean, for crying out loud, look at all the things that are defended now by the left: Letterman having affairs? ‘Yay, Dave! Way to go, buddy. Ha-ha-ha-ha.\u2019 Roman Polanski? ‘Hey, come on! It\u2019s a long time ago. So he raped a thirteen-year-old. Give the guy a break! He\u2019s been through a lot.\u2019 If you are a Republican with a skeleton in your closet, today is the day to announce it and get it out of the way. (laughing) Nobody can say a word to you. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

RUSH: Let\u2019s go to David Letterman. Oh! Where is that story? You know, folks, this is a day where — as I have said — the fraud and corruption that is the US media is on display real time. It is visible, viewable, detectable real time. Now, we all know what happened last night on […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":25,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","ngg_post_thumbnail":0},"categories":[],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\nHow Letterman Gets Laughs - The Rush Limbaugh Show<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.rushlimbaugh.com\/daily\/2009\/10\/02\/how_letterman_gets_laughs\/\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:title\" content=\"How Letterman Gets Laughs - The Rush Limbaugh Show\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:description\" content=\"RUSH: Let\u2019s go to David Letterman. Oh! Where is that story? 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