{"id":26803,"date":"2007-09-12T01:01:01","date_gmt":"2011-05-19T05:00:12","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2011-05-19T05:00:12","modified_gmt":"2011-05-19T05:00:12","slug":"old_fashioned_exercise_research","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/admin.rushlimbaugh.com\/daily\/2007\/09\/12\/old_fashioned_exercise_research\/","title":{"rendered":"Old-Fashioned Exercise Research"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n

RUSH: Ladies and gentlemen, I want to tell you, I saw this story last night, and it\u2019s one of the things that kept me up. I was diligently researching this last night, and I wanted to be able to come on the air and provide ‘expert verification\u2019 of this, but I have been unable. So we are just going to have to rely on the assertions here. It\u2019s from Live Science. We could call this story: ‘Science Keeps Bouncing Along.\u2019 Here\u2019s the headline: ‘Exercise…\u2019 (Laughing) ‘Exercise…\u2019 (Laughing) It\u2019s very unprofessional for the host to laugh at his own material. No, I was not exercising last night. Well, mentally, of course, yes, my brain never stops. ‘Exercise Unleashes a Bounce that Bras Cannot Handle.\u2019 The subhead here: ”Breasts fly up and down a distance of up to 8 inches, study says.\u2019 — Whether women are said to be flat-chested or big-busted, ordinary bras fall short when it comes to supporting bouncing breasts, a new study claims. And, during exercise, women\u2019s breasts bounce more than previously estimated, moving a vertical distance of up to around eight inches compared with a past maximum measurement of six inches.\u2019<\/line> <\/line>Now, you\u2019ve gotta envision this. You have to envision the researchers here. I formed this picture of who these people are. These are probably a couple of geeks with pocket protectors and white lab coats running around, and they\u2019re just fulfilling little fantasies here. By the way, you got a disagreement here. You\u2019ve got one geek with the pocket protector in his shirt pocket saying, ‘No, it\u2019s six inches,\u2019 and the other says, ‘No, it\u2019s eight.\u2019 So they\u2019re slapping themselves around arguing over two inches here of vertical bounce of the female breasts during exercise. This gives me a new perspective on global warming, folks, the kind of people that do research. Now, here\u2019s the next paragraph. ‘The bouncing, in some cases with breasts weighing 20 pounds or more, can prove painful and damaging to the limited natural support system.\u2019 <\/line><\/p>\n

Now, it is at this point that I said I need additional research. Twenty pound breasts? Now, by the way, folks, I\u2019m not trying to be a high-school kid here. This is intriguing to me. I went to my weights-and-measures table. Do you know what a gallon of water weighs? Take a stab. No, it\u2019s nine. But it varies because of evaporation. We\u2019ll make it ten pounds, round it up. Have you ever carried a gallon of water around? Imagine two of those to get a total of 20 pounds. This is where I began my research, no hands-on experience here. I was unable to come up with anybody who had any answers for me automatically on this. If there are such women out there, they don\u2019t need special bras, they need breast-reduction surgery. I\u2019ll guarantee you these women are not exercising anyway. They\u2019re using this as an excuse not to exercise. One of the study\u2019s authors said, ‘It\u2019s only recently that bra design has turned to science.\u2019 This person is a biomechanics professor at the University of Portsmouth in England. There\u2019s a whole section here on breast biomechanics. This is another thing that caused me to do research, and again, ladies and gentlemen, I came up with no answers. Maybe some of you can help. <\/p>\n

‘During walking exercise, the women\u2019s breasts moved relatively the same amount in all directions. But when participants sped up to a jog or run, their breasts moved proportionally more in some directions than others: More than 50 percent of the total movement was in the up-down direction, 22 percent side-to-side,\u2019 and this is the one I cannot figure out, ‘and 27 percent in-and-out. The overall pattern of the movement resembled a figure-eight.\u2019 (interruption) What\u2019s the scientific term for this? Jiggle? Mr. Snerdley, you\u2019ve missed the point here. There may be a scientific term for this, jiggle, but you gotta remember, these pocket-protector geeks are doing this hands-on research. I don\u2019t know how they\u2019re doing it, but they\u2019ve come up with the movement in proportion. Fifty percent of the total movement up and down, 22% side-to-side, 27% in and out. These stories make me come across as naive and uneducated, uninformed, high schoolish and backwards but, folks, I just have to tell you, the only experience I have with in-and-out is below the waist. I can\u2019t figure this out.<\/p>\n

BREAK TRANSCRIPT<\/p>\n

RUSH: Scathing e-mails are arriving from subscribers at Rush 24\/7 at RushLimbaugh.com. (laughing) One of them said, ‘I am shocked and stunned to hear you spend all that time on that last story about breast research. I thought you were more old-fashioned than that.\u2019 Ladies and gentlemen… (interruption) No, it was not Dawn. She may have said it. I didn\u2019t hear it if she said it. This is an e-mail. There are a couple of them like that, but this one said, ‘I thought you were more old-fashioned than that.\u2019 Ladies and gentlemen, I have mentioned this on this program countless times, but many years ago, and I probably need to remind you: ‘I am old-fashioned…above the waist only,\u2019 and that\u2019s the part that counts on this program. So you can rest assured. <\/p>\n

BREAK TRANSCRIPT<\/p>\n

RUSH: We\u2019re going to Wichita next. Jessica. Hi, Jessica, welcome to the EIB Network.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Hi. How are you doing?<\/p>\n

RUSH: Fine and dandy. Never better.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Wonderful! Mega dittos.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Thank you.<\/p>\n

CALLER: I\u2019ve been listening to you since I was a little girl.<\/p>\n

RUSH: A Rush Baby. Another Rush Baby checking in with us here.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Yes, sir. And, anyway, you\u2019ve been educating me for years.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Yes.<\/p>\n

CALLER: And I thought I would help to educate you.<\/p>\n

RUSH: On what?<\/p>\n

CALLER: The, um…breast research.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Oh. Are you sure you want to do this?<\/p>\n

CALLER: I have to.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Hang on. Hang on. This happened about an hour and a half ago, almost two hours ago, and people may not know what you\u2019re talking about. I don\u2019t want to have to go through the whole thing, but two geeks, folks, two researchers went out there and studied the movement of the female breast during exercise. They found that there\u2019s an eight-inch up-and-down movement out there, and it becomes really problematic when you get to the 20-pound threshold there. That\u2019s the first thing in the story that gave me pause. I spent last night researching this and I couldn\u2019t find anybody to give me any answers. They said the movements of the breast are basically up and down, sideways, and in and out, and that also puzzled me. But it was the 20-pound thing that got me because I know a gallon of water is like nine or ten pounds. So these guys, obviously these kinds of researchers wearing pocket protectors in the shirt pocket there, what a life they assign themselves. So that\u2019s what she\u2019s calling about, and I admitted I was looking for verification and answers on this because I don\u2019t take the word of researchers. Okay. So educate me, Jessica.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Um… (snicker) Well, I can definitely tell you, as a…very gifted woman up top (giggles) mine have never moved in and out, and I have never, ever, heard of that in my life.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Well, good, because that means my instincts were right, and I should trust my instincts.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Yes, you should. Um… I\u2019ve had doctors tell me that the best exercise for me would be swimming, and I\u2019ve tried that, and I can\u2019t breathe because they float up into my throat. So I can understand.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Pshew! Another thing I have never heard said before.<\/p>\n

CALLER: (laughing) Now, I\u2019ve never had the inclination to weigh them.<\/p>\n

RUSH: How would you?<\/p>\n

CALLER: I… I have no clue.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Another thing I don\u2019t know.<\/p>\n

CALLER: But, uh… (giggles)<\/p>\n

RUSH: I mean, I know how you weigh your pet. You get on the scale, check your weight, and then you pick up your pet and you get on the scale and see what the new weight is so you know what your pet weighs. I\u2019m sure these researchers have a method for this because the calculations are in the story.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Well, it just does not seem logical to weigh a breast.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Does any of this stupid story seem logical to you? (laughing)<\/p>\n

CALLER: No. (giggles) I don\u2019t think that having large breasts should defer women from exercising, though.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Okay, does it defer you from exercise? You said you can\u2019t swim because it floats into your throat.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Well, I can do the backstroke. But I\u2019m definitely not running cross-country, that\u2019s for sure.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Hell, no! I wouldn\u2019t think so. I think by the time you get to that level of endowment that you\u2019re referring to here in the case of you —<\/p>\n

CALLER: Mmm-hmm?<\/p>\n

RUSH: — that would be painful. That would be counterproductive. You wouldn\u2019t do it long enough to have the exercise pay off.<\/p>\n

CALLER: No, definitely not.<\/p>\n

RUSH: There are other ways.<\/p>\n

CALLER: And it actually tears the tissue, on the inside.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Yeah.<\/p>\n

CALLER: But I have been lifting weights and, you know, so there are exercises that you can do.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Have you ever tried golf?<\/p>\n

CALLER: Yes!<\/p>\n

RUSH: You like it?<\/p>\n

CALLER: Yes!<\/p>\n

RUSH: You know, your swing ought to be pretty good because you\u2019ve gotta copy your arms straight. <\/p>\n

CALLER: (big laugh)<\/p>\n

RUSH: Well, look, it is what it is. I\u2019m doing my Ben Wright impersonation here, but you keeping your arms straight is one of the keys.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Well, keeping my arms straight is not really that much of a possibility, not swinging from… I mean, from…<\/p>\n

RUSH: No, no. That\u2019s good. We\u2019ll just accept it on your own testimony.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Okay.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Look, I\u2019m glad you called, Jessica. I appreciate it.<\/p>\n

CALLER: Thank you.<\/p>\n

RUSH: Thank you so much. That\u2019s what I was looking for last night. I was looking for somebody to give me some sort of help on this research project. Now, I know a lot of you guys were asking me for specifics. ‘What are the specifics? What does she have?\u2019 I wasn\u2019t going to go into that. Folks, this is a program of dignity, and culture, and class, and I was not going to go there and ask for specifics from this woman on that. You should be ashamed of yourselves if that\u2019s what was going through your mind.<\/p>\n

BREAK TRANSCRIPT<\/p>\n

RUSH: We had a couple people on the phones that were going to explain to us how to weigh the female breasts, I said, ‘Come on, we\u2019ve done this enough. We need to move on with the serious stuff.\u2019 Now I have scientists submitting to me PowerPoint presentations on how this could be done. I just sent it to you, Brian, so you can show \u2019em in there. They\u2019re thinking of submitting this for patent. This one<\/a> that\u2019s on my computer now, it\u2019s just a breast example from Madonna, and it\u2019s a cone, and it has all these intricate formulas for it. So it\u2019s the entrepreneurial spirit at work, ladies and gentlemen, among members of this audience.<\/p>\n

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