{"id":11346,"date":"2013-09-17T18:52:00","date_gmt":"2013-09-17T18:52:00","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2013-09-17T18:52:00","modified_gmt":"2013-09-17T18:52:00","slug":"chickified_nflers_sell_one_wipe_charlies","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/admin.rushlimbaugh.com\/daily\/2013\/09\/17\/chickified_nflers_sell_one_wipe_charlies\/","title":{"rendered":"Chickified NFLers Sell One Wipe Charlies"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Listen<\/a><\/p>\n

RUSH: The latest news involving the National Football League and the chickification of same. Four National Football League linemen — these are the big behemoth guys. These are the guys who qualify for the team by living at their refrigerator. They have to eat five times what a normal person eats to maintain the weight required to play the offensive line, and, in some cases, the defensive line. I know this because I\u2019ve talked to some who\u2019ve had to do it, and I\u2019ve met them after they\u2019ve retired and they\u2019re sticks compared to the way they looked when they played. <\/p>\n

At any rate, these are huge behemoth guys, and four of them have signed on to endorse moistened toilet paper for men. This is a product being developed by a small company in Venice, California, and they\u2019re trying to crack a new market here, so to speak, with moistened toilet wipes. <\/p>\n

Now, there is a moistened toilet wipe business sector, and 3% of the toilet paper category is moistened. What do you think…? Just in terms of economics, what do you think the toilet paper sector of our economy is, dollar-wise? It is $8.7 billion. The toilet paper business is an $8.7 billion economy. So this small Venice firm is trying to get in on it with an innovation: Moistened toilet wipes for men. <\/line><\/p>\n

They have a name, One Wipe Charlies. “The players — the Dallas Cowboys\u2019 Travis Frederick, the Minnesota Vikings\u2019 John Sullivan, the Buffalo Bills\u2019 Eric Wood, and the San Diego Chargers\u2019 Nick Hardwick — will be part of a marketing blitz, entitled ‘Clean Snap,\u2019 to kick off in two weeks.” They\u2019re gonna be advertising One Wipe Charlies — moistened toilet paper, if you will — for men.<\/p>\n

“It\u2019s the brainchild of Mike Dubin, CEO of Dollar Shave, who told The Post: ‘Most of the centers we approached were game to try this. They are guys not a lot of people are reaching out to,'” but they want their endorsements, too, and they\u2019re signing up, here.”‘We wanted to make something just for men; it\u2019s aspirational: a way to get it done in one,\u2019 Dubin said.”<\/p>\n

Do you know what “aspirational” means? Well, low-information crowd may not know, and Rio Linda may not know. Aspirational means just something you really want. Like for many people, an iPhone is an aspirational thing, or a Mercedes is aspirational. It\u2019s something that you aspire to if you become success. This product, One Wipe Charlies, known as Clean Snap, is considered “aspirational” in the toilet paper business. <\/p>\n

This is something, it is theorized here, that men will aspire to. They will hope one day they can own One Wipe Charlies. <\/p>\n

“A survey conducted by Dollar Shave found that 89% of wipe users were very satisfied with the cleanliness of their [posterior] after using” One Wipe Charlies. Now, the number of people who are satisfied using standard toilet paper is 58%, after one wipe. The big deal here is one wipe. The satisfaction rate is 89% with One Wipe Charlies, as opposed to only 58% with traditional like Charmin or, you know, if you go to a cheap restaurant, you get the two-ply stuff in there. <\/line><\/p>\n

Mike Dubin, the CEO, said, “I\u2019ve been using wet wipes for years. Its [sic] an enjoyable experience.” Is it the kind of thing that you take a day off from work to do just \u2019cause you enjoy it? “Honey, I\u2019m not gonna go to work today. I\u2019m gonna use my One Wipe Charlies.” Oh, no, it\u2019s happening out there. I\u2019m bringing the news to you as it lines up here in the Stack of Stuff.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

RUSH: The latest news involving the National Football League and the chickification of same. Four National Football League linemen — these are the big behemoth guys. These are the guys who qualify for the team by living at their refrigerator. They have to eat five times what a normal person eats to maintain the weight […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":14,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","ngg_post_thumbnail":0},"categories":[],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\nChickified NFLers Sell One Wipe Charlies - The Rush Limbaugh Show<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.rushlimbaugh.com\/daily\/2013\/09\/17\/chickified_nflers_sell_one_wipe_charlies\/\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:title\" content=\"Chickified NFLers Sell One Wipe Charlies - The Rush Limbaugh Show\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:description\" content=\"RUSH: The latest news involving the National Football League and the chickification of same. 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