“The people want a pardon. They want a political witch hunt corrected, and they want the president to defend his defenders.”
“Did you see where scientists have discovered 24 new species of wildlife in Suriname, including a frog with fluorescent purple markings? My questionabout this frog is: I wonder how it tastes? Fry this thing up, put a little lemon on it — you never know.”
“Armitage was the leaker, Armitage sat by and watched Scooter Libby twist in the wind, and yet it was Libby who helped Armitage defend himself against accusations of libel. Man, that town, folks, is a cesspool of me-ism.”
“One of my favorite questions from last night was, ‘Name the biggest mistake that you think President Bush has made.’ I was trying to think back — did Wolf Blitzer ask the Democrats, ‘Name the biggest mistake Hillary Clinton made as first lady’?”
“People like us have never taken to the street and acted like a bunch of spoiled brat, ragamuffin, nothing-better-to-do-than-blow-up-a-bank-building types.We’ve never done that stuff — we’re busy working.”
“Did you notice that Wolf got to ask questions to all the big guns? Then he turned it over to the local New Hampshire TV people: ‘Oh, Governor Gilmore, I have a question for you.’ I guarantee you nobody had a question for Governor Gilmore until they were told that they had a question for Governor Gilmore.”
“These little pseudo-intellectual thugs that accept these contract hit pieces on conservatives wouldn’t recognize the truth if it smacked them in the face. You libs are not worthy of either tying Justice Thomas’ shoes or shining them. You’re not qualified to be his shoeshine boy!”
“Black men in prison are like the bullet in the elbow of the fetus of America — that’s Obama’s metaphor? What does this metaphor mean, exactly, given that Obama’s party is the party of ‘a fetus isn’t a life anyway’?”
“Honda is discontinuing its Accord hybrid sedan. Says the AP, ‘With gas prices reaching record highs and increasing public interest in environmentally friendly technologies, you’d think that any car labeled as a hybrid would sell easily.’ No, we wouldn’t!”
“Hang on just a second. Rachel, stop crying. I was just kidding! Her eyes are getting red. I was just kidding about a transcription error!”
