RUSH: Ladies and gentlemen, Al Franken and Bill Clinton found it necessary to have a conversation about the latest developments of sexual harassment and how they are both now in the crosshairs. Our microphones were there.

BEGIN PARODY TRANSCRIPT

ANNOUNCER: We now take you behind the scenes as Bill Clinton tries to get some much-needed rest.

CLINTON: It just won’t quit ringing. Harvey, I told you —

FRANKEN: Hi, Bill. This is (mumbling) Franken.

CLINTON: Franken? You, too?

FRANKEN: (mumbling)

CLINTON: A woman says you forcibly kissed her on a USO tour.

FRANKEN: Sorry.

CLINTON: Well, you could say she was attracted to you, but, um, I got it. Just say that you don’t remember the rehearsal that way.

FRANKEN: Another problem. (mumbling) There was a photo.

CLINTON: And there’s a photo of you grabbing her boobs while she slept.

FRANKEN: It’s a joke, a joke.

CLINTON: Okay, that’s easy. You say that they have violated your right to privacy and that what happens in the privacy of your own —

FRANKEN: I posed for it.

CLINTON: You posed for it?

FRANKEN: On the plane.

CLINTON: On the plane? As a joke?

FRANKEN: Can I use the “that ain’t me” defense?

CLINTON: No, you can’t use the “that ain’t me” defense on this one.

FRANKEN: It was just a joke.

CLINTON: Al, you gotta get extremely close to a crazy, powerful Democratic constituency the Republicans can’t deal with, like the gay lobby.

FRANKEN: (mumbling).

CLINTON: You’re joking. You actually said that you were glad a homosexual got killed?

FRANKEN: It was a joke.

CLINTON: Well, let me tell you a joke. Two guys went into a gay bar on a Friday night to pick up a dude. One of those guys better be you.

FRANKEN: No. No, no. No.

CLINTON: Good luck, handsome. Bye-bye.

FRANKEN: No. No, no. No.

ANNOUNCER: Join us next time our microphones take you behind the scenes.

FRANKEN: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

END PARODY TRANSCRIPT

RUSH: Bill Clinton counseling Al Franken on how to deal with this controversy that has erupted over Franken and Leeann Tweeden on a jet. You know, there are some things happening here, folks. I predicted any number of ways this was gonna go, and I could see where the Democrats would have to throw him overboard by today. And I also thought they would do what they could to save him. I thought it could go either way. I did not definitively decide on which way they were gonna go, and I left open the possibility that they would find a way of excusing Franken, find a way of at least getting him different treatment than they are handing out to Roy Moore, and in some cases they are doing that.

There have been media people claiming, “Franken was really not groping! Come on! Everybody can see. That was a setup photo. That was a fake grope.” That’s MSNBC. MSNBC has parsed the grope.

Also over at MSNBC they have actually resorted to impugning the character of Leeann Tweeden. There are whispers, if you know where to go and you know where to watch, you know where to look and what to read, there are people who are saying, “Well, you know what? She’s posed nude. She’s been to the Playboy mansion. This woman’s not this virtuoso out there. She’s got a sordid past. You can’t blame Franken.”

That’s actually been on the air at MSNBC. She went to the Playboy mansion, she’s posed nude, she’s a model, you know, she purposely tries to titillate guys this way. You can’t blame Franken, you can’t blame Franken, what do you think he’s supposed to do, they’re alone over on there in the USO tour? This is a defense that I’m hearing, and — wait for it — “Hey, he was a comedian then, not a senator.” Really? What difference does that make? What possible difference does it make that he was a comedian and not a senator?

So was Louis C.K. So were half these other clowns in Hollywood that have been caught up in this. What the hell difference does that make he was a comedian then and not a senator? I haven’t heard anybody say that Roy Moore was a local assistant district attorney then. The only thing I’ve heard somebody say is that Roy Moore was a Democrat then. And that was me. And the Drive-By Media had a conniption fit over it.

I later learned that there were some stuffed shirts in conservative media that had a big problem with that. Snerdley brought it to my attention. I was stunned. Some holier-than-thou conservative people thought that I was trying to mount a defense of Roy Moore by pointing out that he was a Democrat when it happened. Yeah, they were saying sexual abuse, this kind of thing is not partisan. Give me a break!

All of this is partisan. Every bit of this is. It’s partisan in terms of Democrat-Republican. It’s partisan in terms of insider-outsider. It’s partisan in terms of establishment ruling class and plebes. What the hell, this isn’t partisan? Every bit of this, it’s all partisan. Everything has become partisan because everything’s become politicized.

Now, we can sit here and try to remain above the fray and say that we don’t have any of the criticism that we’re mounting at anybody because of their politics. What a crock. All I did was point out that Roy Moore was a Democrat when all this happened, just a factoid. Never once did I mount a defense of the guy. I don’t know what happened down there, and nobody else does, either. No way I’m jumping into the fray one way or the other.

But I pointed out something that was factually true. He was a Democrat back then. Oh, something else that’s factually true. Nobody cared what he was doing back then. Nobody cared what he was doing a month ago. Nobody cared two months ago what he was doing back then, when he was a Democrat. Nobody cared what Franken was doing all of these years ago as he was deeply immersed in his seeming perversions.

Now everybody cares about everything. Exactly what I meant in my studious, well-intentioned and well-laid-out monologue in the previous hour. Well, what the hell difference does it make that Franken was a comedian then and not a senator? There’s photographic evidence with Franken. “Well, but that was staged. You know, that wasn’t a real grope. I mean, if you look at it carefully.” Oh, really? You’ve been studying that carefully, have you? “Well, yeah, you have to. You have to look at that carefully. You can see that there’s no real contact.” Really? You can notice that? It’s obvious, people have told me.

Franken photographic evidence clearly shows what it is: a 55-year-old married man, father of two, dreaming of, fantasizing about, pretending to, or actually fondling a sleeping woman. Do not care how you slice it. In fact, let me find the sound bite. Grab audio sound bite number three. Here it is right here in case you doubt me.

Late yesterday afternoon, CNN’s Newsroom, Brooke Baldwin was speaking with the chief political analyst, Gloria Borger, about Leeann Tweeden’s allegations of sexual assault against Al Franken. And Brooke Baldwin said, “Mitch McConnell, Chuck Schumer from the left and right both saying there needs to be an ethics investigation. I realize that this was years and years ago, this story, and he was a private citizen at the time. But can Franken survive this, Gloria?”

BORGER: It remains to be seen. I mean, we should say that Leeann did not call for him to step down or say that she thought he ought to step down and —

RUSH: What difference does that make?

BORGER: We have to look at the context in which all of this is occurring, which is Moore, Judge Moore. And that has been, you know, brewing and percolating, whatever you want to say, for days and days and days. He was not a member of Congress at the time this occurred. He was just a comedian.

RUSH: Are you kidding? See, I’m not making this stuff. So here we have, “Well, we need to put it in context and Leeann…” They’re on a first-name basis now. The Drive-Bys are saying, “Leeann, she doesn’t think that he should leave his job.” Okay. “And he was just a comedian, just a private citizen.” What difference does that make? Really? You notice how hypocritical these people are?

Roy Moore I guess wasn’t a private citizen, elected official, way back then, he’s a Democrat, but Franken is just a comedian. Gloria, are you aware that he wrote special scripts for Saturday Night Live fantasizing about giving Lesley Stahl a bunch of pills, that she would be knocked occupant and then Franken would cavort her into certain positions and rape her? Gloria, are you aware of this? He was just a comedian? And Leeann doesn’t think anything should happen to him. But this Roy Moore guy, I mean, we’re looking at first class reprobate status here.

How many of you thought — honestly — I know I can’t hear you — how many of you honestly thought that the Democrats would make fools of themselves trying to save Al Franken? Snerdley is raising his hand. I did too. I knew this could go either way. Because the common sense question, what are they gonna do. They’ve gotta preserve the attack on Moore because that sets up the attack on Trump. And if they try to defend Franken, they are hurting what they really want, which is to get rid of Trump because of all this. But yet there they go.

You know what I’m finding out, folks? This will shock you. That there literally are some people in the media and the Democrat Party who think Franken could be the Democrat presidential nominee in 2020 before this happened. That he’s some kind of intellectual leading light of progressivism. Man, are these people distorted. And, of course, Trump tweeted, calling him Al Frankenstein and wondered where his hands were in the pictures that we haven’t seen. Where do his hands go in pictures 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6? You know, folks, I’m gonna have to get into this a little later because I have to take a break and do want to get to phones.

But the Democrats had better think again if they believe that even if they’re able to take Roy Moore out, if they think that sets them up to take Trump out on this same stuff, they are in for a rude awakening. All they need to do is take a look at the fact that Trump not only survived, he triumphed after the NBC Access Hollywood video.

But yet they think they’ve got 13 or 15 women that they can drag forward claiming that Trump did this or that to ’em. They haven’t figured out Trump has already had this treatment, and he’s already been through it and triumphed over it. But they think they can get Moore, and if they get Moore, that opens up getting Trump. They have another thing coming if that’s what they think they’re gonna be able to pull off here.

BREAK TRANSCRIPT

RUSH: Now, I got a lot of emails from people who thought, “Rush, you’re just making it up. Nobody was ever thinking of Al Franken as a Democrat nominee to run against Trump in 2020.” Au contraire, folks. There’s a Newsweek story that ran on August 25th, and the headline: “Can anybody beat Donald Trump in 2020? Al Franken could be the only one.”

JOHNNY DONOVAN: And now, from sunny south Florida, it’s Open Line Friday!

RUSH: I don’t make this stuff up. I’m telling you, once you learn, once you know that some people, even if they’re in the media, in this party, think that Franken might be one of the people that could beat Trump, then that will tell you how they’re going to conduct the so-called treatment of Franken investigation into his sexual harassment allegation.

They’re gonna try to save him. That’s what calling for an ethics investigation’s all about. You talk about stringing it out. But right here it is. August 25th, Newsweek magazine: “Can Anyone Beat Donald Trump in 2020? Al Franken Could be a Challenger — He may be good enough, smart enough and possibly popular enough to run for president in 2020, but U.S. Senator Al Franken (D-Minn.) may need to be prodded to challenge Donald Trump and fight off other Democrats.”

So this story basically says that Franken is the great secret weapon the Democrats have but that nobody knows it ’cause Franken would have to be talked into running. Now, if you don’t think this tells you that these people are in deep doo-doo. If they really have people at the higher levels of their apparatus thinking Franken is — and I know what some of you are saying. “Yeah, well, some people said that about Trump too.” (laughing)

Anyway, that’s not the point. The point is that there are some in the Democrat hierarchy who think so, which will go a long way toward deciding just how Franken is dealt with. A lot of people thought Franken would have been forced or asked to resign by now. There were some who thought that Chuck You Schumer and these guys would get in gear because, look, they’ve charted their course to get Trump, and they’re going after Roy Moore as a prelude to getting Trump, and if they at all appear to be tolerating somebody in their own ranks who engaged in this and there’s a photo to go along with it and it’s gonna really make their quest tougher.

They don’t look at it that way, folks. Remember, they are fully cognizant they’ve got the media on their side. They know full well what that means. Let me go back. Grab audio sound bite number 3 again. Show you how this would work. You think Franken would be an instant slam dunk just on the hypocrisy basis. I want you to listen to how CNN set the table late yesterday on the day we learned of this, how CNN sets the table for Al Franken sustaining his role in the Senate.

We have here Al Franken being talked about by Brooke Baldwin and Gloria Borger. And question: “Mitch McConnell and Chuck Schumer are both saying there needs to be an ethics investigation. I realize this was years and years ago.” Well, it was years and years ago with Roy Moore, too, Brooke.

Old Brooke Baldwin says, “Yeah, I realize that with Franken, this was years ago.” Roy Moore took place a lot longer ago than this Franken story. This Franken story goes back 11 years, Brooke. The Roy Moore story is 38 and 40 years ago, Brooke. But yet here she is saying, “Now, I know, Gloria, that this happened a long time ago, this story, and he was a private citizen at the time, Gloria. But can Franken survive this?”

BORGER: It remains to be seen. I mean, we should say that Leeann did not call for him to step down or say that she thought he ought to step down and —

RUSH: Stop the tape. Excuse number one for keeping Franken. “Well, Leeann” — first-name basis. Not “the woman,” not “the victim,” not “Ms. Tweeden.” No. Gloria Borger said, “Leeann did not call for him to step down or to say that she thought he ought to.” And so if Leeann is not bothered, why then should we be? Okay, here’s next. Prepare for another start and stop here, Friday.

BORGER: And I think, look, we have to look at the context in which all of this is occurring —

RUSH: Stop the tape! Now all of a sudden there is context that we must perceive. We haven’t been asked to look at the context of Judge Moore. Nor Weinstein, actually, but here with Al Franken we gotta look at the context. The context of what? Well, listen.

BORGER: — which is Moore, Judge Moore. And that has been, you know, brewing and percolating, whatever you want to say, for days and days and days.

RUSH: Stop the tape! So Judge Moore, why, this has been percolating for days and days and days and days. We gotta keep this in context. Judge Moore, we’ve been looking at this for days and days and days and days and days, days, days, and we just learned about Al Franken today. And so we have to keep this in context. What does any of this mean? What does any of this have to do with anything? Nothing except obfuscating it and creating a pathway for Franken to escape and survive. And here the piece de resistance.

BORGER: He was not a member of Congress at the time this occurred. He was just a comedian.

RUSH: Yeah, we can’t hold Franken to account. He wasn’t even in Congress at the time. Well, Gloria, Judge Moore wasn’t even a DA at the time. He was an assistant DA at the time who liked going to the mall. But Franken? “Well, he was just a comedian. He was just a private citizen, Brooke, so I don’t know that we can necessarily say Franken should go.”

And there you have it. And that from an accredited member of the Drive-By Media will tell the Democrats we can survive this, the media will cover for us. The media will not demand that Franken go. The media will not do stories on what a reprobate pervert the guy is. They’ll do stories on what a funny guy, one of the funniest writers on Saturday Night Live. They’ll praise the guy and they’ll go to the women in Franken’s office who are already doing Nina Burleigh type things.

And if you don’t what that means, look it up, because I have to move on. Well, Nina Burleigh promised Bill Clinton as many Lewinskys as he wanted just as a thank-you for keeping abortion legal. So the women in Franken’s office, “He’s so nice, so sweet, we saw never saw behavior like this, I can’t believe it, can’t be true.” See, setting the stage here for Franken to be given a pass with the media — what would you call it? — not riding shotgun. I mean, the media is clearing the decks. The media is running interference here.

And Chuck Schumer and Al Franken doing the old Statue of Liberty play back there behind the line of scrimmage, and the media just taking everybody out. Mitch McConnell at middle linebacker is already on the bench.

BREAK TRANSCRIPT

RUSH: I think there’s another factor, too, in the Democrats trying to circle the wagons and save Franken like they saved Dan Rather. And that is if they let Franken go overboard — how many other Democrat reprobates are there that are waiting to follow? Like Ted Kennedy and Chris Dodd and the waitress sandwich. There is actually a story in the Stack today about a guy who remembers that incident and is writing about it. It’s all coming unglued now.

So if there are other Democrats who’ve done what Franken did and the Democrats do a big ceremony about throwing him overboard, then how do they save anybody else? Like what if Kirsten Gillibrand, for example, well, take your pick of any Democrat. I just took the first Democrat that came to mind. But as we all know, Dingy Harry had the hots for her, that’s true.

BREAK TRANSCRIPT

RUSH: Don in Mexico, New York! That’s a first. I’ve never taken a call from Mexico, New York.

CALLER: Hi, Rush. How you doing?

RUSH: Just fine, sir. Thanks much.

CALLER: So I just wanted to comment on what you had said earlier about Al Franken, how the Democrats are coming to his defense and saying, “Oh, he was a private citizen at the time, so it doesn’t matter.” Where were they when all these allegations were coming out against President Trump? He was a private citizen. I didn’t see anybody, any of them coming to his defense.

RUSH: Yeah, he was just an entertainer. He just was just, you know, hosting The Apprentice and so forth. He was a golf course builder and developer and so forth. But he was running for the presidency, see, and that made it serious. But you’re absolutely right. The hypocrisy is dripping off of these people. I tell you with Franken, folks, it really… It has to be that they can’t throw him overboard because then they would have to throw every other Democrat that’s identified overboard. And he’s not the only one. He cannot possibly be.

In fact, there’s a story out that Congress has already paid something like $15 million in settlements to women who have alleged sexual harassment over I forget the period of time, 10 years. I mean, it’s something that routinely apparently is alleged and there are payoffs. And it’s your money. Taxpayer money is paid to the women who allege that members of Congress have done things to them. But you just know that there have to be others besides Franken, and they have to protect them. So it’s gonna be real interesting.

The media’s gonna be running interference. The media is gonna give them cover. The media is gonna protect Franken while still trying to destroy Roy Moore and then Trump. And it’s gonna… But with the sophistication of people today, the media doesn’t get away with as much as they used to. It’s gonna be fascinating to see how this all works out, if they do try to literally save Franken and try to make it out like nothing really happened here, which is what they’re gonna have to try to do. Okay, before we hit the break here, Don, your turn: iPhone 8 Plus or iPhone X, you name it? IPhone X.

RUSH: iPhone X. There’s no question. I’m just asking. But, folks, if you end up with an iPhone 8 Plus — I mean, anywhere — do not be disappointed. It’s a shame that the 8 Plus came out the same year as the X, ’cause it’s just awesome. What’s your carrier?

CALLER: Verizon.

RUSH: Verizon is your carrier, and you also are gonna be comped a one-year subscription to The Limbaugh Letter and RushLimbaugh.com so hang on, Don, so we get your address and make all this happen.

BREAK TRANSCRIPT

RUSH: The governor of Alabama, a woman, is voting for Roy Moore. She says even there’s no reason not to believe the women, the female governor is still voting for Roy Moore in Alabama. Okay. Well, fine. See what they deal with that with Al Franken. See you on Monday, folks. Have a good weekend.